Faking it ’til you make it might be why you have imposter syndrome (Holistic Hustle)

February 8, 2022  |  Kharissa Parker

Kharissa Forte, Holistic Hustle, Grace & Grind

Kharissa Forte is a writer, certified health coach, and columnist for Startland News. For more of her self-care tips on how to keep your cup full, visit graceandgrind.co.

I’m not one to get caught up in the hoop-lah of celebrity crushes, but if there’s anyone who I #WCW it’s my Pisces twin Rihanna. (I mean, come on. She’s a total boss.) As much as I love Riri, I have to admit that I don’t quite agree with everything she says. This is especially true when it comes to her response to an E! News reporter’s question last fall about how she handles insecurity.

Reporter: What do you do on those days that you don’t feel that confident?

Rihanna: I pretend.

Reporter: Fake it?

Rihanna: Yeah.

Reporter: Until you make it?

Rihanna: I mean, why not?

The video went on to become a popular soundbite on TikTok and Instagram Reels, but treating her answer as advice isn’t the best idea — especially for entrepreneurs. 

Throughout my first couple of years building a business, I learned rather quickly that faking it ’til I make it wasn’t getting me anywhere. Conversations I had with my friends on their own success journeys echoed this sentiment. If anything, faking it was leading to more stress, anxiety, and pressure to keep up. Even though we were all smart, creative, and capable in our own right, none of us felt, well, good enough. 

What we were experiencing was imposter syndrome and we weren’t alone. Studies show that up to 82 percent of people experience imposter syndrome and women are hit the hardest. According to healthline, imposter syndrome “involves feelings of self-doubt and personal incompetence that persist despite your education, experience, and accomplishments.” 

While anything from family to culture and other factors can be causes of imposter syndrome, I definitely believe falling into the fake-it-til-you-make-it trap is one of them.

So, how do we battle the beast? Here are a few tricks that helped me.

Photo courtesy of to JESHOOTS.COM, Unsplash

Photo courtesy of to JESHOOTS.COM, Unsplash

Seek fulfillment instead of validation

Society has taught us that fame and recognition are signs of success. There’s nothing wrong with being seen or rewarded but those things can’t be the focus. You have to decide to chase purpose over praise, even when no one else gets it but you. When you’re operating in alignment with your higher self and trust in divine timing, the applause will come soon enough. Until then, reminding yourself that there’s a deeper meaning behind what you do will help you stay focused on the fact that you’re right where you’re supposed to be.

Separate who you are from what you do

Quick: Tell me about yourself without telling me about what you do. Can you do it? Do you even know who you are? Hiding behind your title (and really any role or responsibility, for that matter) is a tell-tale sign of faking it that will naturally lead to imposter syndrome — but I get it. We all have an image to maintain. The bottom line is that what you do should be a reflection of who you are, not the other way around.

Value the fact that you don’t have to be the expert

Social media puts a lot of pressure on people to identify as experts with their master courses and authoritative stances. It’s as if there’s a subconscious fear that if we dare say, “You know what? I don’t know the answer to that,” we’ll put our whole career in jeopardy. In reality, that’s simply not the case when you’re just getting started. 

Honor your humble beginnings. Being honest about what stage your business is in or what level of insight you have so far builds more credibility and trust than a fluffed-and-feathered answer ever will. When you hold grace space, you remove the pressure to perform and meet standards that you’re not equipped to handle, yet. You also open doors to expand and meet people who can help you further your growth. And all you have to do is keep it real.

The Big Aha

Faking it ‘til you make it an easy way to find yourself combatting imposter syndrome. This doesn’t have to be your story. By operating from a place of fulfillment, knowing who you are, and removing the pressure to be a know-it-all, you can kick imposter syndrome to the curb once and for all.

Fueled by her expertise as a writer, certified health coach, and local business owner, Kharissa Forte is passionate about helping entrepreneurs in Kansas City achieve their goals without sacrificing self-care. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.

This commentary is possible thanks to support from the Ewing Marion Kauffman Foundation, a private, nonpartisan foundation that works together with communities in education and entrepreneurship to create uncommon solutions and empower people to shape their futures and be successful.

For more information, visit www.kauffman.org and connect at www.twitter.com/kauffmanfdn and www.facebook.com/kauffmanfdn

startland-tip-jar

TIP JAR

Did you enjoy this post? Show your support by becoming a member or buying us a coffee.

Tagged ,
Featured Business
    Featured Founder

      2022 Startups to Watch

        stats here

        Related Posts on Startland News

        Her fund targets investments for women of color; why this VC is fighting a lawsuit that would curb equity-focused funding 

        By Tommy Felts | January 18, 2024

        The fight for equity — especially among Black and brown entrepreneurs — isn’t easily won, said Ayana Parsons, likening the setback-laden struggle to a boxing match that seemingly never ends. “There are many rounds,” Parsons recently told a Kansas City crowd gathered at Burns & McDonnell’s campus for an event to honor diverse legacies. Parsons’…

        West Coast health tech company bringing dozens of jobs to new River Market headquarters in KC

        By Tommy Felts | January 18, 2024

        A West Coast health tech startup’s relocation to Kansas City is expected to give the company direct access to key clients in the region — as well as creating 35 high-paying jobs, representing more than $3 million in annual payroll, regional officials announced Thursday. Orange County, California-based Hart, Inc. plans to transition its operations to new…

        $100K in federal funds take stage at Kansas City theater forced to relocate because of COVID

        By Tommy Felts | January 13, 2024

        Challenges from the COVID-19 pandemic continue to impact the arts, said Evie Craig, whose organization was forced to relocate because of an unexpected revenue drop caused by the global health crisis. A recently announced $100,000 in American Rescue Plan grant funding from the Entertainment Industry Grant Program administered by the State of Missouri Department of…

        KC Restaurant Week breaks down silos between diners, Kansas City’s chef-driven food scene

        By Tommy Felts | January 13, 2024

        One of Johnson County’s favorite destination culinary experiences is back on the menu for Kansas City Restaurant Week, a 10-day showcase of innovative tastes from kitchens across the metro. “It helps the food industry,” said Laura Favela, executive chef at Silo Modern Farmhouse, said of the highly-anticipated, post-holidays event series. “The second goal is to…