How fatherhood and fear changed my entrepreneurial journey

May 17, 2016  |  Louis Byrd

Louis Byrd

Editor’s note: The opinions expressed in this commentary are the author’s alone.


As I near my sixth anniversary of becoming an entrepreneur, I decided to take a moment to look back and reflect on the changes those years brought me.

entrepreneurial journey

Louis Byrd and his son

I’ve had many ups — and many more downs — all serving as excellent lessons. I watched my personal bank account balloon and then slowly taper away during slow times. I have met great people who believed in me and my vision, and who motivated me to continue.

I would have not made it without the support of a lovely woman who is tolerant of the late nights, long days and occasional instability. Never once has my wife wavered in believing in me, even when I didn’t believe in myself.

Most importantly, last year, she blessed me with the greatest gift, the perfect motivation to want more and to push myself even harder: our son.

That’s when the fear set in.

When I found out I was going to be a father, my first feelings were shock and hysteric surprise. On that Tuesday morning, my smile — which people tell me is already Cheshire Cat-like — felt as though it grew even wider. Everything was going to change, and I couldn’t be more excited.

As that first emotional high made room for my day-to-day reality, I realized that professional success and stability now mattered so much more than ever before.

“Not being able to quickly find a more stable paycheck pushed the fear out of my stomach and into an infinitely more dangerous place: my heart.”

– Louis Byrd

As excited as I was about fatherhood, deep down in the pit of my stomach there now resided a dull and numbing fear. It was no longer going to be me fending for myself and my lady; we now had to ensure the safety and well being of this new little person.

Fear became my motivation.

Owning my own business no longer seemed like an exciting adventure — the occasional slowdown, after all, could impact my child’s wellbeing. As soon as that thought took hold, I hit LinkedIn and started applying for jobs for the first time in years.

I updated my resume, created unique cover letters in the form of cinematic videos showing my creative prowess, and applied for top-tier positions at major companies knowing I could kick ass if given the opportunity.

I notified my team and told them that I may have to pare the company down to more of a freelance endeavor. It was tough, but they were understanding.

Two weeks later I landed a round of interviews with a major company. I just knew I had the job in the bag. I was more than qualified, had the experience they were looking for plus some, and felt like I had a great interview day.

But they didn’t hire me.

In fact, all the other jobs I applied for over the course of that first month and all the LinkedIn messages I sent remained void of response. To be honest, I was crushed — I felt I had so much to give to these companies and potential roles. Why didn’t they want me?

The insecurity of not being able to quickly find a more stable paycheck — while at the same time listening to all the stories of how expensive kids are — pushed the fear out of my stomach and into an infinitely more dangerous place: my heart.

My son brought me back.

“My son reignited the fire I have for being the master of my own fate.”

– Louis Byrd

I started a journal for the child I had just discovered would be a son. My first entry to him was about how important it is to find purpose in life and embrace the inevitable fear along the way. Writing to my son let me finally get a handle on my own fear of uncertainty.

After I finished that journal entry, my phone rang. On the other end was a recruiter from the first — and only — company with which I had landed an interview.

The recruiter explained that they didn’t offer me the job because they felt that I was overqualified for the role. They instead wanted to contract with my company for some video work they needed.

That deal was a turning point in my journey.

Since becoming a father, the day-to-day business has begun to make more sense. My focus, purpose and priorities have changed. I’m no longer an entrepreneur because it’s something exciting to do (although it is). I’m building a legacy, something my son would be proud of.

I think that change in mindset has helped me gain confidence and in turn become a better businessman. I’ve taken more advantage of the game-changing opportunities that have come my way. I now have the confidence to shake hands and speak my mind to local business leaders and expand my reach as a thought leader in branding and cultural competence. This past year I’ve never been more focused in my business and confident in my ability to be a successful entrepreneur.

The takeaway?

Your family should not stall or hinder you from pursuing your purpose. Don’t let fear take you over, instead let your love for them motivate you to push harder and succeed. My son has not only motivated me to want more for his sake, he reignited the fire I have for being the master of my own fate. Everyday I thank him for it.


 

Louis Byrd is the founder of Mellie Blue Branding, a cross-cultural branding agency that helps companies elevate their brands through strategy, creativity and the fundamental idea of being more human. Follow Byrd on Twitter @SiuolByrd.

startland-tip-jar

TIP JAR

Did you enjoy this post? Show your support by becoming a member or buying us a coffee.

Tagged , ,
Featured Business
    Featured Founder

      2016 Startups to Watch

        stats here

        Related Posts on Startland News

        Gooding: Narrow your focus to win on an exit

        By Tommy Felts | March 28, 2016

        At the time it wasn’t quite so obvious, but now I realize that I was incredibly fortunate to spend the first part of my career in small-market mergers and acquisitions. Turns out it’s an arena where one can acquire an incredible depth and breadth of business knowledge. On an almost daily basis, I was learning…

        busted bracket

        Thomas: 3 investing lessons from your busted bracket

        By Tommy Felts | March 24, 2016

        Editor’s note: The opinions expressed in this commentary are the author’s alone. It’s here — the one month of the year where a single college basketball tournament costs employers a collective $1.2 billion for every hour of lost productivity. And it’s fantastic! I’m a big believer that we can find investing lessons in nearly every…

        Stephens: It’s time to embrace Kansas City’s cowtown character

        By Tommy Felts | March 23, 2016

        Editor’s note: The opinions expressed in this commentary are the author’s alone. I get it. I do. Many of you moved to Kansas City from small Midwestern towns to get away. Kansas City is the big city. You are tired of the fly-over jokes, the rolling prairie, the Casey’s General Store. You want hip, cool,…

        Apple encryption

        The WTF Series: Encryption and Apple’s predicament

        By Tommy Felts | March 21, 2016

        For those of you who have been living under a rock the last month, there’s a “little” snafu going on between Apple and the FBI. The FBI handed Apple a court order demanding access to the password-protected iPhone of a mass shooter. In an open letter to customers, Apple CEO Tim Cook explained that the…